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Weekend Update - News Jokes

July 17-28, 2016

7/28/2016

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  • An apartment building was evacuated this week due to a strong order that was produced when a tenant cooked his own urine.  The man was not charged with any crime after promising to never home-brew Coors Light again.
  • ​Debra Messing and Blake Shelton got into an argument on Twitter about politics, which only hurt their credibility as America's 1,345th and 1,654th most trusted political pundits.
  • It was so hot in New York City this week that a man stripped naked and went for a walk around the Upper West Side on 69th Street, because of course he was on 69th Street.
  • A Canadian woman fired her pellet gun at Pokemon Go players in downtown Toronto this week in order to protect her gym.  I have no idea what any of that means, I'm just jealous this makes Canada's headlines while in America <<<on screen graphic of gun violence from this week>>
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